\n Born to Polish-Catholic immigrants who always took me to church, I grew up with faith in my life. But I had a lot of questions that weren't being answered. And so, turning 18 and heading off to NYU, I lost my faith. I honestly didn't "believe" or "not believe”. I simply forgot God.
\n\n I dreamed of becoming a singer and songwriter. At the end of my freshman year at NYU, my dreams started to bloom into fruition. I signed a record deal with a major label and began recording an album. In this new world, I became obsessed and consumed with money and vanity. I even turned my back on my family and friends and gave myself up to two years of being self- consumed, dating the wrong guys and being in the music business purely "for the money". Since money was my focus, I began having panic attacks about not having enough. Sometimes they lasted for hours..
\n\n Then in October of 2010, while on a work trip in Nashville, my panic attacks became about death. Being that I had no faith in anything, I didn't know what to believe. I remember the Monday I was in Nashville, my friend Louie called me and started talking about Jesus and Heaven. Then that Thursday, I had the worst attack of my life. After nine hours of screaming, shaking and crying, the only person I wanted to speak to was my friend Adam, a worship leader in Texas and true man of God.
\n\n During this awful attack, Adam was in a meeting and couldn't call me, so he sent me a text message. Adam’s said, "I can't talk now, but read this.” It read, "Psalm 23. Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I have no fear". Boom. That was it. When Adam called, I accepted Christ on the phone and was reborn.
\n\n That Sunday, I flew to Los Angeles to stay with my producer Ron Aniello and his wife Jeanette, both of whom are devout Christians with strong faith. They took me to church. The next morning, I woke up and got a call that my friend Louie, the one who told me not to fear death and trust in Jesus, had died. At first, I couldn't even cry, because I knew that Louie was with Jesus.
\n\n Since October, I've reconciled with my father. He and my mother and my step-mother are friends now and if anyone needs proof there is a God, that would be it. God also gave me the strength to end my relationship and move to Los Angeles. I signed a new record deal and publishing deal. And this time, I know why I am in the entertainment industry. And that’s for God’s glory. I’m humbled every day He chose to not only give me my talent, but I am humbled that even when I didn't care about Him, He wanted me.
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